In 2016 I cried out to God for change. What I saw in my heart wasn’t what I saw in His Word & I wanted to be all He paid for me to be. I had previous encounters with Him- but this one was different and lasted for about 7 months, where the tangible presence and glory of God would manifest in the room as I would pray and seek Him.
During this time He began to reveal to me lies I was believing & as He exposed them He would also reveal the truth to me. I felt so free in this place to be able to be totally transparent with Him- hiding nothing in shame. I realized a lie I believed was if I let Him in my heart that way, He would be disgusted or appalled by me and my thoughts. I found out He didn’t see me like that at all. He saw the things as what we’re holding me back from being the TRUE ME. I was struggling with gory images appearing in my mind when I was praying or in worship & hearing blasphemous things about Him. I struggled with anxiety, postpartum depression, perverted thoughts I didn’t want to think of but would be in my head regardless, emotional trauma, issues with sexuality and low self-esteem. The topics He was giving me insight on were “intimacy” and “identity”. All this time He was exposing the lies & revealing truth in His presence- breaking the chains & freeing me completely. Day after day, I was so blessed to have Him reveal Himself to me these ways… I know He is always there, but to tangibly feel His presence and love without fail will bring you to tears in such reverence and awe.
In the book of Revelations the Bible says, “Let us rejoice and exalt him and give him glory, because the wedding celebration of the Lamb has come. And his bride has made herself ready.”
I believe we’re in a season where we are to consecrate (devote) ourselves for Him and remain that way. To come before Him in conviction & humbly let Him in to do transformation on us. I’m sharing this testimony of healing because HE CAN DO IT AGAIN. I believe that when we read His Word, believe it & accept the identity Jesus paid for us to have, bringing the things that are not truly US to Him & asking for Him to make us like Him- He sees the transparency & childlikeness & moves on that.
We are of a high value: He sent His Son in our place to prove our worth not that were just a bunch of sinners.
Intimacy means being transparent before Him, hiding nothing…
So in transparency in the secret place in prayer as we open our hearts and let Him take the sins weighing on us- it makes room for the light and truth to come in… (John 8:38) Jesus says He received truth in His Father’s presence. As we continue in His word He reveals truths, brings conviction, we lay the thing were convicted of at His feet & He does the healing & transformation (essentially this is what repenting is– it’s awesome!! And not as “religious” as religion has made it out to be) Into-me-you-see… and as we behold Him, we become like Him…
Identity is the result of really knowing Him intimately. Bible says as He is so are we in this world (1 John 4:17).
I remember once when he was teaching me these things I had stolen something from a store- feeling guilty for it I asked God why it was such a big deal since no one would even notice such a small thing… I clearly heard Him say “because it’s not my character”. Such a great answer!
More on Identity: In the Bible Jesus said if you’ve seen me you’ve seen the Father (John 14:9). Jesus also told the Pharisees that they were in likeness with their father the devil because of his characteristics as a murderer & liar- and Jesus identifies them as children of Satan because they have the same characteristics.
So basically the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree- but I don’t believe this applies to the earthly parent but the spiritual. What we see in Him we begin to take on… that is our true identity- in Christ. Everything else we lay it down as the old self (Ephesians 4:22-24). That’s what it means to be BORN AGAIN- we’re given to our brand new Father & declared a Child of God as it was always meant to be from the beginning! ❤️
Part of our identity is being the Bride of Christ. As the Bride, let us yield to the Holy Spirit and make ourselves ready!